TANTRIC INTIMACY EXERCISES…The Tantric Touch…613 878-8179

Have you ever experienced a soul mate connection?  Do you want to try? Deepening your relationship emotional intimacy  allows the soul mate connection to appear.
Emotional intimacy is the connection with another at their deepest level. Emotional intimacy can be a most enjoyable experience. Emotional intimacy is being completely open and honest with another.  It is sharing your authenticity, hopes and dreams….your inner you. Anyone can create a deep intimate relationship.

We take
intimacy for granted, believing that when we first fall in love, the intimacy will subsequently follow. By this I mean the “emotional intimacy.” Emotional intimacy is different from physical intimacy or sex. Emotional intimacy does not automatically manifest itself. It is a skill to learn, practice, and master.

Part of loving another involvles opening up to them in an intimate fashion. To do this,  WE MUST LOVE OURSELVES. To master emotional intimacy, we must be in touch with the human that is “us.” We must  be comfortable experiencing our emotions, senses, pleasures, masculine and feminine psyche, and trusting our own inner senses. It means being FULLY relaxed with who you  are and just enjoying yourself. Only then can you share that wonderful “self” with another.

To begin, effective communication is essential. Not only the ability to express ourselves, but giving ourselves the permission to talk to our partner about anything. When you open direct, honest communication channels, you begin creating emotional intimacy.

Try the following format; when____________(this happens), I feel___________(an emotional feeling), Because___________, and I want___________
It is a good way to talk so the other person can hear you. If you add reflective listening to this equation it will work best. The partner than reflects back what they hear you say or feel. “What I hear you say is___________.” You can then check to see if they hear what you intended them to hear.
Eye contact creates a deep experience of oneness. Eye contact can be difficult if you are not used to gazing in another person’s eyes. Give it a try and practice.
Honest, direct and open verbal communication creates a deep experience of sharing, caring, and vulnerability. Yep, I said vulnerability. You can do this, it will create a soul mate connection that lasts. You will be proud and joyous.
You need to be FULLY present, which means to really be there with your partner. Not just physically present, with your mind and thoughts somewhere else, but attention, body, and soul, right there front and center. It takes practice to learn to be present. When your partner talks, really listen. Don’t prepare answers in advance in your mind. This is where reflective listening will help. You will have to reflect back what you hear, so you cannot be rehearsing your next speech.
Accepting yourself for who you are in the moment, allows you to feel trust. You are on the road to the soul mate connection. Accepting yourself may be the hard part. You are “human” not perfection.  Being “real” is fantastic.   Accepting your partner as is in the moment creates safety for your partner to just be.     To accept doesn’t mean to like, to approve or to agree.
To accept means , “This is who I am right now and this is who you are. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine.” You can be ever changing, ever growing, ever evolving humans. Acceptance is essential in order for us to experience complete emotional intimacy.
Be creative and playful, try something new. We are not going anywhere definitive. Emotional intimacy does not have a destination. This is not foreplay. Each time you “experience” each other the intimacy deepens and your soul mate connection solidifies at a deeper level.

Remain open and allow your spontaneity and intuition to lead you. Remember, you are practicing a new skill, not aiming for a perfect performance. You are in search of your soul mate connection.
Try this exercise to build emotional intimacy;

Practice at least ONCE daily.   Set aside 1/2 hour and enjoy the related 
relaxation and warm feelings.  Do not hurry. Turn off the TV and phones.  
Sit opposite your partner while your knees touching. For about 10 minutes just gaze softly into each other’s eyes. Be receptive, soft and gentle. Allow your thoughts, feelings and body sensations to be there. Just allow time and space to hold you both. Stay present.
Now you are ready for the HEART SALUTE:

You will sit in the Yab Yum position. Create a quiet space, perhaps your sacred safe space.  Sit face to face. In this space, place your right hands on each other’s heart. Look deep into each other’s eyes. Spend a few minutes just being together. Coordinating your breathing will increase the intimacy of this
  • Now spend about five minutes each saying the following;
  • What I love about you ……
    What I appreciate about you ……
    What I admire about you ……

The partner doing the listening … Just listens. The listening partner checks in with themselves.  Notice what you are feeling.  Are you able to let these messages into your heart? When partner 1 is finished, partner 2 responds with “thank you.”  Again, no fixing, no response to statements…only acknowledgement you “heard” your partner. Partner 2 now has a turn.
  • What I love about you ……
    What I appreciate about you ……
    What I admire about you ……
Partner 1 responds with “I hear you” statement. Take your time. Add whatever you like. This is your appreciation/admiration time. End with a hug.  Take your time.
This exercise should be done each day. People today often have “scurvy of the soul.” Our own soul is not nurtured and fulfilled. We may have a tendency to do what society or culture tells us will bring us happiness or joy. We often pay no attention to our own ability to enjoy pleasure and don’t take the time to learn how to give pleasure. We may not even know what pleasure” means for ourselves.
If we ignore pleasure, we cannot fully developed emotionally. Pleasure is a vital ngredient in a healthy relationship. Today we get the message that men give pleasure and women receive. Some men don’t give themselves permission to receive pleasure. When they do their relationship deepens and becomes more intimate and solid. Deepening your relationships emotional intimacy will allow the soul mate connection to appear.
Pleasure your soul with a deeper emotionally intimate relationship. I wish you JOY!