Massaging the vagina called  the Yoni (Sanskrit  word meaning Sacred Space or Sacred Temple) is an ancient Tantra sex ritual.  The Yoni is traditionally seen from a perspective of love and respect.

The Yoni Massage creates a safe space for the woman to relax and enter a state of high arousal and experience much pleasure from her Yoni. This massage is also a way to effectively treat a woman for sexual blocks, traumas or fear of sex. Her partner (the giver) enjoys the satisfaction of being of service and witnessing a different area of Tantra sex. The Yoni Massage is also a form of safer sex, as well as an excellent way to build trust and intimacy.


The aim of the Yoni massage is not orgasm nor to bring on a climax. Orgasm is often a pleasant and welcome side effect of the entire ritual. The aim is simply to pleasure and massage the Yoni/vagina. From this perspective, both receiver and giver can relax, and not worry about achieving something. When orgasm does occur, it’s usually more expanded, more intense and more satisfying. Orgasm may or may not happen, depending on what you learn by experience.

In this massage, the giver has nothing to gain; he  just allows the receiver to enjoy the massage and to relax into herself afterwards. Of course, other sexual activity may follow but it would be entirely at the the receiver’s discretion. This perspective will not only build greater intimacy and trust, it will also broaden your own sexual horizons.

STARTING THE PROCESSTake a shower together as it relaxes both the receiver and giver. A quiet space with pleasing music, red candles and fluffy pillows is desirable to make you both relax and feel safe. Allow yourself enough time and never, never rush the process. You can really set the right tone with soft silk mattresses, white curtains, and a dim red light!

Go to the bathroom before the massage. When both bowels and bladder are empty, you can avoid unwelcome bathroom interruptions.  Clean the genitals carefully with a soft soap. And the giver must have his finger nails properly trimmed.

Cuddle with your partner by hugging, holding, and eye gazing to transport you both to a safe place of deep relaxation.

RITUALHave the receiver lie on her back with pillows under her head so she can look down at her genitals and up at her partner (giver). Place a pillow, under her hips. Her legs are to be spread apart with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions under the knees will also help) and her genitals clearly exposed for the massage.

The giver sits cross-legged between the receivers’ legs. The giver may wish to sit on a pillow or cushion. This position allows full access to the Yoni and other parts of the body.

Before making contact with her body, begin with deep, relaxed breathing. Both giver and receiver should keep breathing deeply, slowly and focus on mutual relaxation during the entire process. The giver will gently remind the receiver to start breathing again if the receiver stops or takes shallower breaths. Deep breathing, not hyperventilating, is critical here. Do not try to control your breath or take extra long pauses between breaths.

Gently massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, and breasts, to allow the receiver to relax and the giver to prepare for touching the Yoni.

Pour a small quantity of  organic massage oil or lubricant on the mound of the Yoni. Pour just enough, so that it drips down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni. Generally, you will find that oils are always the best lubricants.

Begin gently massaging the mound and outer lips of the Yoni. Spend some time here ; do not rush!  Relax and enjoy giving the massage. Gently squeeze the outer lip between the thumb and index finger, and slide up and down the entire length of each lip. Do the same thing to the inner lips of the Yoni/vagina. Take your time.

The receiver can massage her own breasts or may just relax and continue breathing deeply. The giver and receiver should look into each other’s eyes as much as possible. The receiver can tell the giver if the pressure, speed, and  depth need to be increased or decreased. Limit your speaking and focus on the profoundly pleasurable sensations. Too much talking tends to get one out of their feelings and diminishes the sensual effects.

Gently stroke the clitoris with clockwise and counter-clockwise circles. Gently squeeze it between thumb and index fingers. Do this as a massage and not to get the receiver off. The receiver will become very aroused but continue to encourage her to just relax and breathe.

Slowly and with great care, insert the middle finger of your right hand into the Yoni.   In rituals and Tantra sex,  the  right hand is specifically used for polarity. Very gently explore and massage the inside of the Yoni/vagina with this finger. Take your time, be gentle, and feel up/down and sideways. Vary the depth, speed and pressure. Remember, this massage is all about nurturing and relaxing the Yoni.

With your palm facing up, and the middle finger inside the Yoni, move the middle finger in a “come hither” gesture or crook back towards the palm. You will contact a spongy area of tissue just under the pubic bone, behind the clitoris. This is the Sacred spot as says Tantra Sex. Your partner may feel the need to urinate or it may feel painful or pleasurable. Again vary the pressure, speed and pattern of the movement. You can move side to side, back and forth, or in circles with your middle finger You can also insert the finger that’s between your middle finger and pinky. Check with your partner first before inserting two fingers. Most women will enjoy the increased stimulation from two fingers. Take your time and be very gentle. Use the thumb of the right hand to stimulate the clitoris as well.

Optional: First, you must ask permission from your partner to insert one lubricated finger gently into her anus. Use the finger which you are not going to insert into her Yoni. Again be very gentle. It’s best to use the little finger in her anus.

Use your left hand to massage the breasts, abdomen, or clitoris,   If you massage the clitoris, it’s best to use your thumb in an up/down motion, with the rest of your hand resting on and massaging the mound. The dual stimulation of right and left hands will provide much pleasure for the receiver. Do not use your left hand to touch your own genitals because it takes focus off the receiver. Remember, this massage is for her pleasure and the benefit comes from not only the physical stimulation but the intent as well.

Continue massaging, alternating different speeds, pressures and motions. Keep breathing and looking into each other’s eyes. Powerful emotions may surface for the receiver and she may even start crying. Just keep deep breathing and be gentle. Many women have suffered sexual abuse and need sexual healing to move forward into happy, healthy relationships. A giving, loving, patient partner is of great value to her.

If she has an orgasm, keep her deep breathing, and continue massaging. More orgasms may occur each gaining in intensity. In Tantra, this is known as “Riding the Wave.” Many women can learn how to be multi-orgasmic with Yoni Massage and a skilled, patient, loving partner.

Keep massaging until she tells you to stop. Then, slowly, gently, and with great respect, remove your hands. Allow her to just lay there and enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni massage. Cuddling or holding is very soothing as well. As you gradually master Yoni Massage, you will discover that  your own sex life has become greatly enriched.  As a bonus, you will learn a great deal about female sexuality.

Just Practice,  Have Fun, and Follow your Bliss!


Tantric Touch Massage for Women – 613 878-8179

Tantra is Goddess Worship and originated in cultures  closely connected with the earth and our natural cycles. They worshipped the divine in feminine form. 

Tantra emphasizes yin love making and being rather than doing. In Tantric practice, the woman often leads and sets the pace. Her well being and pleasure is of the upmost concern.  In Tantra, Women are revered as Shakti, the creative and sexual power.

Having studied Goddess history and  Female Spirituality,  I am passionate about women’s empowerment. I would love to share this deep Goddess wisdom with you in a Tantric Touch Session for Women.
Tantric Arts Session for Women…I teach techniques and skills for taking your lover to new heights of pleasure. You can teach your man ejaculation mastery, how to stay on the edge as long as you want, and to experience prolonged, full body, multiple, and non-ejaculatory orgasm. You can teach your lover how to bring you more pleasure, orgasmic energy, and multiple full body orgasms. I can instruct you on amrita or female ejaculation, frigidity, and any other relationship or sexual issues you may wish to address. These sessions are teaching sessions only and can include a model and male tantric.
Additional Sessions…I also offer more experiential sessions for women who may enjoy receiving loving, nurturing, and/or erotic touch from a woman. All sessions available to men are also available to women at a $50 discount.

Tantric Touch Massage…Seven Key Aspects 613 878-8179


Tantra today is caught up in an air of mystery or a secret sex cult. While Tantra is enshrouded by its sexual aspects, the broader approaches of breath work, meditation, movement and ritual are much larger components. If we replace the word Zen with Tantra, it helps to demystify it. Zen is defined as an approach, a way of seeing the world, a meditative state of mind; such enlightenment can be attained through meditation, contemplation, and intuition.

Tantra is about expansion, connection with the universe, and a way of achieving unity.  Ultimately, Tantra is about shifting our perception of reality. Tantric Massage aims to use various techniques, deep breathing, relaxation, connecting exercises to help drop you into reality to truly see, feel and experience the sensation in the body, senses and energy.

Even if you start out just interested in learning about the sexual aspects of Tantra, you will inevitably learn about many other aspects of the philosophy. Ideally, you will absorb the best of both worlds — the sexual and sensual advice you desire, and the spiritual outlook you need to transform your life.  And once you delve into Tantric sexuality, you will be inspired to research Tantric beliefs on spirituality.

The seven key principles which Tantric massage seeks to incorporate are Surrender, Awareness, Movement, Breath, Sound, Intention, and Acceptance.
Use theses keys for every aspect of your daily life…work, sex, health, love and communication. Tantra supports our living a liberating, satisfying life while  tantric massage fuses these elements together in a sublime, heartfelt way.

Ritualizing Your Flow of Sexual Energy

“Love is the answer but while you’re awaiting the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.”Woody Allen

Love is beyond pure quantification but SEX is something we CANDIDLY discuss.  We know if it’s good OR bad.

Most SINGLE clients tell me they are looking for love. Will lighting candles or wearing sexy lingerie be enough to “set a fire” in the bedroom?  No! None of these “tips” strike at the core of sex and the physical connection that it implies; they are all supportive of the cause but they are incomplete and more passive than active.

 In the 1883 translation of India’s human sexuality classic, the Kama Sutra., Chapter 4 discusses the setting of a home for “receiving women”; i.e., Sex. After setting up the home with lutes in position, garlands of flowers strategically positioned, a pillow on each side of the bed after taking the afternoon nap, teaching parrots to talk, anointing the body with oils and bathing,  we are  ready to get down to action.

The Kama Sutra emphasized ritual in setting the stage in preparation for a higher passion quotient. Variety is amazing in the bedroom, but a practiced set of rituals, performed like daily exercise, affects how you flow with sex in your life. 
Knowledge of Tantric Bedroom basics can heighten romance and relationship energy in your life and your space, Indeed,  your basic attitudes and behaviors are reflected in your present environment and either make you strong (like exercise) or weaken your energy or “chi” (like excess TV, internet). If you simply clear clutter without habits to keep your place clean, it will go right back to a mess in seconds. The same goes for your sex life.  Before you start changing sheets, you need to change habits to ensure passion and sensuality stay and grow in your life. Ritual is the way of the Kama Sutra; let it be your way.

What new rituals can you install in your home life to boost your sex life? Oysters? Chocolate? Lingerie? Absolutely! Yet beyond the basics, how can you find the rituals that can open your life up to a greater flow of sex? Cultivating great habits of self-love keep you always in the ready.  Self-indulgences go a long way in stoking the flames.

The following  rituals can help you create the most synergy and sensuality in your sex life, setting you up for some powerful bedroom Tantric sexual intimacy.

1. Yoga.  Yoga has radically improved many people’s sex lives, especially women. The evidence is stacked in favor of practicing yoga for better sex. Flexibility is wood energy. Wood energy feeds fire. Fire=Sex. Also, the flexibility, mentally and physically, of yoga creates a more open-minded, free-flowing approach to being sexually creative. Who wouldn’t want to be more creative?…especially in bed!

2. Ylang-Ylang Oil. One single drop of ylang-ylang oil on a piece of unfinished pottery on a nightstand beside your bed every night is a huge sex-drive enhancement. Rose oil is another favorite, but the ylang-ylang is a powerful libido enhancement.  Ladies, clove oil can powerfully attract men. 

3. Learn from the ancients and Angelina Jolie. Indulge in oils and lotions like the ancients did.  Angelina Jolie once said, “I love to put on lotion. Sometimes I’ll watch TV and go into a lotion trance for an hour. I find brands that don’t taste bad in case anyone wants to taste me.” Get yourself a similar routine. Avoid fake fragrances and scents as they are too sweet/cloying.  Neutral, spicy or earthy fragrances like roses, musk, sandalwood or jasmine are  appealing to most. For example, Khiels Original Musk can drive me wild.   Also, patch test oils and read their contra-indications. Essential oils do literally work like a supplement or vitamin would, so be alert to allergies and sensitivities.

4. Mirror-Mirror-On-The-Wall.   Privately find a ritual that you can do with yourself, by yourself  that affirms your sexy. Of course, this is a private ritual, one that you will need to imagine and play with, but it can be very powerful.   You can have your own “I’m so hot and irresistible” moment every day. Keep your mirrors absolutely spotless, and if a mirror directly faces a bed, block it with a canopy or other curtain the best you can while you sleep. However, while you “do other things in bed,” the “doubling” effect of a mirror with a full view of the scenery can double the power of the bedroom action.

5. Get more sleep!  In 2005, the National Sleep Foundation found that close to 25% of couples in the US  have lost interest in sex because they are always so tired. Chapter 4 of the Kama Sutra explicitly includes an afternoon nap in the list of vital activities in every man’s day to prepare to “receive women.” While not realistic for many, weekend naps often are doable. Do them! Take the time to refill your “sleep bank” so you don’t suffer mentally, emotionally and hormonally.

Enjoy whipping up your own version of sensual rituals  and practice them with gusto. Your resulting radiance, confidence and magnetism will  turn heads. Once you have your sense of sexiness in order, start implementing even more TANTRA  in the bedroom to take things to the next level.